I once hated reading, but I disciplined myself to do it anyway and now have a genuine love for books. I always ask people what they’ve read recently and I’m always shocked when they respond with something like “Oh, I haven’t really read many books since college.” Oh really? Not only is that just plain sad, it’s a quick way to get passed up in the marketplace.

There are so many smart people out there writing such great stuff. Honestly, too much great stuff. I would read for hours if I could, but I’ve found that an hour a day minimum keeps me satiated. Here are a few tips for making reading a part of your day:

Commit to a time.
I personally like mornings. I get in early and clear a few things off my list. Then around 8:00 am, I take an hour for reading at the local coffee shop. I also enjoy an hour outside in the park as a great way to mix up my day.

Have a system.
My reading consists of blogs, e-newsletters, articles and books. I’ve given up on trying to stay current and clear out my RSS feed. I just commit to that hour. In that hour, I dedicate 40 minutes or so to my current book and another 20 minutes to the digital stuff. (Stay tuned for a future post where I will describe in detail my system for collecting and reading digital content.)

Share.
Finally, I share with my friends what I’ve been reading. I find it addicting to give away books or share a title that may prove helpful. You’re not just reading for you. You’re also building knowledge that you can give away.

So, speaking of sharing…read any great books lately? Feel free to comment about your favorites.

People are always surprised when I dive right into an awkward conversation with little or no fear. The truth is, nobody (myself included) likes awkward conversations. But I would much rather talk about the elephant in the room when there’s still hope of getting him through the door instead of waiting until he grows so big that he punches the roof off the house.

Here are a few things that I’ve found helpful when approaching a tough subject with someone:

Respect.
Regardless of how awkward or perhaps hurt you feel, a little respect for others can go a long way. You blow your top and nobody wins. Be mad at the situation, yes, but not the person. This takes humility, but everyone wins when people are humble.

Clarity.
Being clear about how you feel and defining the desired outcome will help you keep some of the emotion out of it. Being passionate is fine, but if your emotions get the best of you, that’s when the false accusations start to fly. If the situation warrants, you may also want to put together a list of things to cover or solve in order to keep the conversation on target. In some situations, this list can be emailed in advance to prepare everyone for some elephant herding.

Courage with the end in mind.
It takes courage, but approach the situation with the end in mind. How much energy and time is wasted avoiding awkward conversations? The truth is that some things just won’t go away on their own. You can wish all you want, but at some point that conversation needs to happen. The sooner you dive in, the sooner it will be over, no matter the outcome.

What is that thing you’ve been avoiding? That conversation that just needs to be had? It’s time. The elephant is getting bigger while you read this. Take steps to deal with it this week.

[photo credit]

I’m not talking about Donald Trump here. Back in the olden days, many tradesman had an apprentice that learned whatever skill that tradesman practiced. It seems that we’ve lost some of that in the modern era, which is really sad. This post goes out to both the mentor and mentee.

For the mentee.
Find yourself a mentor, someone who’s been around the block a few times and will be open to sharing their experiences with you. In my 14 years of business, I have always had someone wiser that I spend time with. It started early on with my dad before we even started Crossgrain together and I was growing up in the family business. I was his apprentice and learned a ton about business and hard work. It continues for me today in the form of an advisory board. My point is that it can take on all sorts of forms, but you should always have a mentor. Be transparent and be humble and get out and find someone to meet with.

For the mentor.
You are needed now more than ever. So many young entrepreneurs are looking for guidance and it’s really your responsibility to show the young guys the ropes. That’s right, I said “your responsibility.” I feel like every successful person has achieved success because of the people and experiences in their life. To me, that means they owe a debt and the only payment due is to share that knowledge with someone else. Don’t wait for someone to ask, insert yourself into a young person’s life and give them the gift of your experience.

P.S. The rule of being mentored is that at some point you have to give back as well. Even if you don’t feel like you have anything to give, there is always someone that you can pass along your knowledge to. Knowledge is not for you to hoard; it’s for you to share with others. This is why I never turn down a coffee or lunch with a young designer. I might not be able to share much, but I can certainly share myself.

(photo credit)

One of our “intangibles” (as Tim Sanders calls it in “Love Is The Killer App”) is our network. He talks about sharing our network openly, about how we sometimes grow our network for the sake of others. It’s similar to my belief that we read books for the sake of others, I prescribe them like a doctor would medication; a “read this and call me in the morning” sort of thing.

When it comes to connecting people in your network, the old school of thought is that you maintain the middle man position and see what you can get out of it. I think brokering a product can be a good business model, but brokering relationships can get sticky and make you come across as selfish. I believe that if we support the success of others, it will come back around. Zig Ziglar said, “You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help enough other people get what they want.” So true.

So, what is the best way to connect people? Well, face-to-face is the most personal approach, but also the most time-consuming. That’s why I love email for this purpose. It’s the quick and perfect way to connect people. Here’s how to share the love amongst members of your network:

1. Send one email to both versus sending separate emails. It takes less time and gets you out of the way sooner.

2. Include a little blurb about each person, perhaps how you met or brag about a project you did together or a service they provided. It’s your stamp of approval.

3. Include both parties contact info so they can connect. I like name, email and a phone number. If they have a website, that’s a good tidbit of info to provide too.

4. Finally, preface that you just wanted them to meet and encourage them to connect. This shows that you are thinking about both parties and shows your value as a “connector.”

I find this to be a very efficient way to connect others and grow the overall value of our networks. Remember, all ships rise with the tide.

There’s something about getting things out in the open that really helps us work through our junk and keeps us humble. It’s easy for us to buy into the lie that we are the only ones facing a certain issue, that somehow our problems are unique. I believe every human being is unique and special, but our problems are shared.

When I finally open up and share something, that’s me choosing to move beyond denial and arriving at a point where I can learn something. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve opened up and been inspired by someone else’s comments. Most people love to help. People don’t like to ask for help, though. Funny how that works.

Now I’m in no way suggesting that you become someone who complains or constantly begs for help. At some point you have to push through your stuff solo.

But being transparent is about helping others. You’re transparent FIRST so that others may be encouraged by your struggle and determination to work things out, Second, you’re transparent so that you can learn something. Being transparent is different than asking others to take away your problems, it’s about all of us learning together.

Be more transparent, I say. We have much to learn from each other. Besides, what’s the worst thing that could happen? You get laughed at? I’ve been laughed at before. You cry? Yeah, I’ve done that. You get yelled at? Sure, that’s happened before too. Trust me. That person you think has it so figured out? He is just as broken as the next guy.

Unlike cars, we don’t depreciate over time. The more miles or experience we have should allow us to charge more for what we do. Something may only take me a couple hours to figure out but that efficiency should be a gain for us both. As a client, you get the good ideas, the perfect solution. As the vendor, I get the benefit of doing what I do well and charging accordingly for that service.

However, like cars, I think if we aren’t careful, we can begin to tarnish and rust over time. I’m shocked at how many people I meet that haven’t read a book since college. The world is moving at an incredible pace. If you don’t do things to continue learning, you will soon find yourself left behind.

Experience + continued learning = a very valuable person in any market.

Some young guy might have the learning but lack the real world experience to make things happen. Likewise, a more experienced person might have the years, but may have grown stagnant and as a result becomes a dinosaur at his trade. So keep learning, read constantly, be open to new ideas and put in the miles.

Been in a funk lately? Feel like no matter what you do you can’t seem to get back on top of where you were last month or last year? Sometimes it’s important to just hit the reset button, even in the middle of a hectic time.

When I’ve had enough and I’m at that point where working at my desk almost becomes counterproductive, I hit reset.

What’s this reset button I speak of? It could be something fun, maybe time with family or friends. Perhaps it’s time spent alone or off listening to a lecture. For me, the best reset is time alone or time spent on my bike.

You also need to know what you are going to do after the reset. If you don’t have a plan for next steps, your day away could easily turn into a couple days or longer. You want to make sure when you reset, you do it correctly. If not, you could be in danger of taking a day off only to return and feel the same burn out as before. Add discouragement to the mix and it just gets worse. To create my post-reset plan, I write down three characteristics of a time when I felt productive and happy and like I was really handling things.

Finally, I hit the reset. Just close up the office and leave for a day. I don’t think about work in that time; just truly take time to reset. When I come back the next day, I focus on doing those three things or taking on those characteristics from a better time.

Sometimes it’s counterproductive to fight; hit the reset and don’t feel guilty about it. (Radio Shack has some reset buttons for sale if needed)

It’s funny to watch my two boys interact, especially when the older one teaches the younger. While watching them, it struck me that no matter the age, we all have opportunities to mentor.

Someone in college has something to give incoming students. Someone in high school could read to younger kids. You get the idea. But when most people think of mentoring, they often think of an older person with 30 years of experience mentoring someone much younger. But I think we all have something to give.

Maybe you don’t think of yourself as a mentor or maybe you just don’t see the value. But I personally never turn down a young designer’s request for coffee. So much of who I am as a person is the result of the wisdom of others. Who am I to hoard that information? It’s in my head so that I can give it away.

The younger generation is desperate for mentors. Please, for the sake of us all, get out and share what you’ve learned. Even, as in the case of my two boys, if it’s just teaching someone how to properly run around the park screaming. I can think of plenty of times in my life when such a lesson would come in handy.

We’ve all heard the saying “work smarter, not harder.”

I think there is a common misconception that working “harder” means working “longer.” Somehow, we think more hours equals more success, but this is not always true. Another common misconception is that working “smarter” means only working four hours a week, which is also not true. Ultimately, I think it depends on how you define success. If you’re looking for only financial gain, then perhaps working “more” will get you what you want.

But for the sake of what? At the cost of what? Are you working non-stop and not taking care of your health? Does your family remember your face? Are you pursuing anything fun in your life? Are you giving back anywhere? What do you do each week to clear your head?

It takes lots of hard work to build a business, no doubt. But maybe we should re-tool this phrase and have it read “work smart and hard, then go home.” It’s not about getting to a four-hour work week; it’s about finding balance in your life.

One of my favorite quotes from Zig Ziglar reads, “I believe that being successful means having a balance of success stories across the many areas of your life. You can’t truly be considered successful in your business life if your home life is in shambles.”

work smart and hard, then go home!

Do you get stuck sometimes? Do you find yourself drifting over to Twitter or Facebook because you just don’t want to look at that project anymore? Maybe it’s time to hit reset.

We call it the “Hot Lap” at my office. Get up, go outside and take a lap around the block. It’s amazing what it can do for your productivity when you’re struggling.

P.S. Sorry to my cold weather friends. I realize that being in California makes the “Hot Lap” a little more possible than some other places in the country. So, take a “Cold Lap” and laugh at the poor saps in Cali, with their stupid high mortgages and time wasted on freeways in stupid traffic.

photo credit James Marvin Phelps